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A, B, or C question :)
A, B, or C question :) / Dating / 2:33 PM - Thursday August 07, 2008
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A Creative (Male, Los Angeles, 29-35, Artist / Musician / Writer) asked:


story,
met this girl online in san diego, we had seen each other a few times.
she came over to see me this past weekend for a day, we slept together. Then I took her to see her girl friend in riverside where she stayed for a few days. I offered that she could stay a bit longer at my place after she was done seeing her friend. I have been noticing that she is a bit spineless, and the type of person that nicely forces her will.
There's something I don't fully like about her, and changed my mind about her staying.
When I told her that I was taking her to the train station because the weekend I had things to do, she kept trying to extract what I had to do. (I sounded like I was lying big time) so I finally gave up said, ok, we can hang out the whole weekend, she didn't sound the least concerned.
when it came time to pick her up I noticed her hosts were already tired of her.
right now she is in my apartment, while I'm working. my other friends (which one of them is someone I reaaally like) invited me out salsa dancing tonight. I really want to hang out with my friends and see this other lady.
Questions:
what do you suggest I do?
A: go home, tell her how I feel, buy her a train ticket and take her to the train station?
B: forget about tonight with my friends, go home, tell her how I feel and take her to the train station?
C: just spend the weekend with her and tell her how I feel on the last day?


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A Thinker (Female, 29-35, Other Profession) answered:

Screenname: mountainchic


Let me get this straight, you invited her to your home, slept with her, invited her back, changed your mind about her, changed it again and said she could stay, changed your mind AGAIN now that she's at your house, and you're wondering how to dump her so you can go ruin some other woman's weekend?

I say option D: Tell her the truth, that you're a wishy washy weasel and don't want what's in front of you, and leave that other poor woman alone until YOU can hold on to your own decisions for more than 18 seconds at a time.

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Community Rating: Community Star

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A Life of the Party (Female, Indianapolis, 46-55, Administrative) answered:

Screenname: kmf1


Tell her she has to go home cuz your GF or wife is coming back into town early.....

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A Mr. Nice Guy (Male, 46-55, Hospitality) answered:

Screenname: joeblow1234


Boy have you got your tit in a wringer. Why don't you go with the one you want and just show up at your place with her and hopefully the other one will get the message? Be a man and just tell her your mom passed away.

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A Career Woman (Female, 26-28) answered:

Screenname: witscharm


Tell her you have plans and go out with your friends, your a nice guy - some girls will/try to take advantage of you. If you know that she'll ask to come along tell her you need some space and walk out the door...have shoes on your feet and keys in hand! Getting in the company with your friends will ease your conscience if you feel bad about leaving her by herself - it was her choice to stay. Do what you need to to maintain sanity.

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A Married Girl (Female, Miami, 29-35, Home Maker) answered:

Screenname: anonymouse32


d) suck it up - if shes from out of town youve disadvantaged her

so suck it up, and tell her on the last day if you must

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A Thinker (Female, 22-25, Military) answered:

Screenname: misssparkle


Funny how you got the p***y and now you dont like her, anyway since you offered you really should do C. how would you feel if a man treated your sister that way?
A man is ONLY as good as his word and Karma comes back.
Remember that.

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A Cool Mom (Female, San Antonio, 22-25, Administrative) answered:

Screenname: satxflirt


Honestly I'd say shes only using you for a place to stay and I'd go out with my friends and be with that girl you like. It aint like shes your girl or your wife. Sex is sex right? You shouldnt have to be uncomfortable in your home if she starts trippin drop her ass off at the train station.

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A Thinker (Female, San Diego, 29-35, Other Profession) answered:

Screenname: silver75


What a minute! Didn't you just refer to HER as spineless? Yet, SHE was the one who kept asking you what you were really doing this weekend and then you finally gave in and said she could stay? Hmmmmmmmmm. You should have stopped it then and there by saying something came up that you had to take care of. A family emergency or whatever (Actually that one could still work, if you want to try it).

You seem very indecisive. If you already had the hots for a friend of yours then why did you hook up with this San Diego chick and let her stay the weekend? Doesn't make sense to me. But tell her as soon as possible. Don't ruin the rest of her weekend. Jsut say you're not sure if you two are a good match. Lie and say you're not fully over your ex if you have to. Or go with the "family drama/emergency".

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