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How do I slow down his orgasm?
Sex & Intimacy / 2:42 AM - Sunday December 28, 2008

How do I slow down his orgasm?

sooo I've been having an issue recently with my boyfriend & it's that he has been getting off ridiculously quickly. we've been together for awhile and this is a brand new issue - like a week ago it started happening and now it's every time he's done in like three minutes.

big downer for him cause he feels like a failure and needless to say - gets me nowhere really.

we've narrowed it down to possibly changing while we were having sex and I was on my stomach and he was behind me and he - while going at it - hit himself on like... my bone and hurt himself. Since then he gets off super quickly.

I need suggestions on making it last longer - if possible. I'm also concerned that it maybe something more serious. Ever heard of anything like this? I know it sounds crazy.

- Asked by A Thinker, Female, 22-25

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Hrm, I doubt that him hurting himself physically caused this. Premature ejaculation is simply a lack of control during sex, and I don't think you can "break" a penis in such a way that it will lose its control.
Perhaps this incident has caused him to be a little apprehensive when having sex and that is translating as him not being able to last. Perhaps not.
Here are my other tips and techniques for "staying power":
1. Switch positions regularly and favour positions that he finds help him last longer (generally anything that doesn't feel as tight).
2. He should try to keep his breath regular. Heavy breathing and other signs of approaching orgasm only make that orgasm come faster.
3. He could try the stop-start technique. This is where he removes his penis when he's about to cum (while continuing to stimulate you). When he's regained control, you start again.
4. Finally, some major condom companies have a type that contains a mild anesthetic. This will numb his penis slightly, so will reduce sensation, and delay orgasm.

Good luck!

- Response by scar1etstar1et, An Alternative Girl, Female, 22-25, Therapist

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Make him jack off first. Second orgasm always takes longer.

- Response by msheartbeat, A Trendsetter, Female, 46-55, San Francisco, Self-Employed

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Yeah, he's simply not caring enough to take his time and to make sure you get yours. Or, he's just too sexually immature to know how to make it last. I mean, I can see if he came fast the first time. But, after that he should have gotten that initial release out. Sometimes, this happens when they haven't gotten any in a while. Extending foreplay goes a long way towards both people enjoying the experience.

Truly great lovers know how to do this. Often they enjoy the ability to give the most pleasure to the person they are with moreso than getting it. If it's just sex and him getting off. I'm sorry, but he's not going to be too concerned about whether you get yours or not. You say, he's feeling inadequate in regards to pleasing you. But, what is he doing different to change the problem? If the injury was the problem, I doubt he'd be able to get pleasure at all. Let alone, faster. If it concerns him as much as it does yourself. Maybe, the two of you can see a Doctor about what's going on and get some help. Good luck whatever you two decide.

- Response by thelovedovefor1, A Creative, Female, 46-55, Atlanta, Who Cares?

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second and third orgasms last longer,so don't worry about the first.At his age there is plenty.
To prolong the first however when you feel him getting close stop moving ,stretch his penis toward his feet ,as far down as you can go without hurting him.This kind of pressure will slow him down and repeat as many times as needed t\until you are ready.

- Response by A Mr. Married Guy, Male, 56-65, Artist / Musician / Writer

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