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When my parents were 30, they were so mature and had so many responsibilities.
Family & Parenting / 5:20 PM - Sunday July 05, 2009

When my parents were 30, they were so mature and had so many responsibilities.

Sometimes, I compare myself to my parents and I think, "Woah...how did my parents do it at such a young age? They were married with 3 kids!" I'm 30. And although I finished graduate school and am living alone, I'm not nearly as responsible as they used to be when they were 30. In fact, I still feel like a kid thats not ready for the whole commitment, marriage, family, home thing. I think I'm SLOW for my age... Times have changed...do you agree?

- Asked by ladydimples, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, Los Angeles, Who Cares?

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I agree. I am 32 and I feel like you. I feel like some sort of Peter Pan. But I'm telling you, it's not good! By not having too many responsibilities, you are missing out on emotional growth.

At 32 I found out I need to have kids NOW if ever. That changed my world. From the SHEER PANIC at my first pregnancy test to the wish that the test turns positive is a long way. I feel I grew up in a matter of months. And I feel richer for it even though I still don't have children.

Looking back at myself a year ago, I find that self focus is a good thing, as long as you are moving with it, as long as you are not stuck in a daily loop where nothing changes. I also think that there is more to life than just work, friends, hobbies. I feel like I lived in a bubble. By shutting yourself out from responsibilities, you are hindering your growth.

Enjoy life and have fun. But set yourself a limit. Say, 33. Don't just live the day until you are 40, because then it will be too late. Your spirit might be young, but your body ages and when the discrepancy is too high, you will suffer.

- Response by A Thinker, Female, 29-35

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They had kinds on their hands, but they also lived in a simpler world. Knowledge and technology have accelerated and consume large parts of our lives. You're taking care of a lot of things they did not have to.

- Response by stoney07, A Creative, Male, 56-65, Seattle, Who Cares?

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oh yea definitely, I'm 24 and although I've been through more than most kids my age, I still feel like I'm 19 mentally.

- Response by seanc, A Guy Critical, Male, 22-25, Financial / Banking

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I hope times have changed. I'm more with your parents situation. I wish now, that I'd taken more time for myself, although I wouldn't trade my 3 kids for anything, I just wish I'd had them a little later in life, when I knew who I was.

- Response by tortureu2, A Thinker, Female, 36-45, Other Profession

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Maybe your parents weren't as responsible as you seem too think...I made it clear too my son when he turned 18 and 21 respecttively, he was welcome too stay in my home, but he would have too follow my rules and pay rent, otherwise he could just get out..he is now 31, married has two children a very nice home a good job two cars, but just one garage...so, if you are in th 29 plus age and don't think you can make it in life..someone forgot too give you a bill...my son was five years old when he said too me, I would like a pizza for supper..I threw him the phone book, (not at him, too him), I said the closet place that will deliver is Marco's I spelled that for him because it sounds like it has a k in it...he looked it up in the phone book, called them, ordered a large pizza with Pepperoni and they not only livered that pizza too this 5 year old but took a check from him...(of couse I had made the check out, it was my checking account), but the driver took the check left the pizza went back too work..so even at 5 my son could at least order his own food just in case, and he got them too take a check...now, today he tells me that I am getting old and that I should sell my house and his mother and I should move in with him..I always say, are you out of your mind? You don't want me anywhere near you....if I am living there, you live by my rules not yours and it is your house..and besides that, I am still a cop, I am in homeland security, and I ride a motorcycle, so which part of getting too old too care for myself did you jump too? I protect your ass from the bad guy and I have a gun..golly gee, but thanks..I will call you, you don't need too call me.

- Response by phoenixbandit, A Guy Critical, Male, 56-65, Columbus, Law Enforcement

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lol-- My mom was 30 when they had me. And I was kid #7. Could you possibly imagine having SEVEN right now??
I agree with Kramer

- Response by makinit40, A Cool Mom, Female, 46-55, Self-Employed

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No, you are not slow you will change when you get your responibilities. Be happy and enjoy your freedom. FYI, I didn't get responisble until my baby girl was born and thats pretty much how it happens.

- Response by te12, A Hip Hop Girl, Female, 26-28

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Not to be at all offensive, but why do you think that having a kid or getting marriage is some sort of landmark, something that is desirable to attain?

Many people are at their best levels of accomplishment when they DON'T do these things. They're what most people do--do you feel you have to be like most people? I think it's sad when people feel that way.

Spend some time thinking about what YOU want, not what other people tell you you SHOULD want, and see what you come up with. But above all, it tends to be a very bad idea whenever you do anything merely because you think it's what you "should" do--and getting married or having kids because people say it's what you "should" do is a recipe for a lot of misery that you can avoid. :/

- Response by electragold21, A Thinker, Female, 29-35, New York, Teaching

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Times have definitely changed, but it's better not to use our parents as a basis of comparison, but better to compare our current self with our previous self, that way we'd be able to give ourselves more merits for our achievements and improvements :D

- Response by simplyasking, A Thinker, Female, 26-28, Who Cares?

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