GIVE ADVICE ON SEX &AMP; INTIMACY

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Sex & Intimacy / 1 day ago

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taking an informal survey directed to the women out there to help settle perceptions about men...

just answer the following questions regarding guys and their "private time"

1. how often would you say a single guy masturbates?

2. how often would you say a guy in a relationship but not living with his woman masturbates?

3. how often would you say a married guy masturbates?

4. where and when do you think MOST guys masturbate?

- Asked by An Engaged Girl, Female, 29-35, Who Cares?

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This is the way it is.....

How's this for apocalyptic literature. This was written by a pastor's wife in biblical prose as a commentary of current events.
----------------------- -
And it came to pass in the Age of Insanity that the people of the land called America , having lost their morals, their initiative, and their will to defend their liberties, chose as their Supreme Leader that person known as "The One."

He emerged from the vapors with a message that had no meaning; but He hypnotized the people telling them, "I am sent to save you." My lack of experience, my questionable ethics, my monstrous ego, and my association with evil doers are of no consequence. I shall save you with hope and Change. Go, therefore, and proclaim throughout the land that he who proceeded me is evil, that he has defiled the nation, and that all he has built must be destroyed. And the people rejoiced, for even though they knew not what "The One" would do, he had promised that it was good; and they believed. And "The One" said " We live in the greatest country in the world. Help me change everything about it!" And the people said, "Hallelujah! Change is good!"

Then He said, "We are going to tax the rich fat-cats." And the people said "Sock it to them!" "And redistribute their wealth." And the people said, "Show us the money" And the he said, "redistribution of wealth is good for everybody."

And Joe the plumber asked, "Are you kidding me? You're going to steal my money and give it to the deadbeats??" And "The One" ridiculed and taunted him, and Joe's personal records were hacked and publicized. One lone reporter asked, "Isn't that Marxist policy?" And she was banished from the kingdom!

Then a citizen asked, "With no foreign relations experience and having zero military experience or knowledge, how will you deal with radical terrorists?" And "The One" said, "Simple. I shall sit with them and talk with them and show them how nice we really are; and they will forget that they ever wanted to kill us all!" And the people said, "Hallelujah!! We are safe at last, and we can beat our weapons into free cars for the people!"

Then "The One" said "I shall give 95% of you lower taxes." And one, lone voice said, "But 40% of us don't pay ANY taxes." So "The One" said, "Then I shall give you some of the taxes the fat-cats pay!" And the people said, "Hallelujah! Show us the money!"

Then "The One" said, "I shall tax your Capital Gains when you sell your homes!" And the people yawned and the slumping housing market collapsed. And He said. "I shall mandate employer-funded health care for every worker and raise the minimum wage. And I shall give every person unlimited healthcare and medicine and transportation to the clinics." And the people said, "Give me some of that!" Then he said, "I shall penalize employers who ship jobs overseas." And the people said, "Where's my rebate check?"

Then "The One" said, "I shall bankrupt the coal industry and electricity rates will skyrocket!" And the people said, "Coal is dirty, coal is evil, no more coal! But we don't care for that part about higher electric rates." So "The One" said, Not to worry. If your rebate isn't enough to cover your expenses, we shall bail you out. Just sign up with the ACORN and you troubles are over!"

Then He said, "Illegal immigrants feel scorned and slighted. Let's grant them amnesty, Social Security, free education, free lunches, free medical care, bi-lingual signs and guaranteed housing..." And the people said, "Hallelujah!" and they made him king!

And so it came to pass that employers, facing spiraling costs and ever-higher taxes, raised their prices and laid off workers. Others simply gave up and went out of business and the economy sank like unto a rock dropped from a cliff. The bank banking industry was destroyed. Manufacturing slowed to a crawl. And more of the people were without a means of support.

Then "The One" said, "I am the "the One"- The Messiah - and I'm here to save you! We shall just print more money so everyone will have enough!" But our foreign trading partners said unto Him. "Wait a minute. Your dollar is not worth a pile of camel dung! You will have to pay more... And "The One" said, "Wait a minute. That is unfair!!" And the world said, "Neither are these other idiotic programs you have embraced. Lo, you have become a Socialist state and a second-rate power. Now you shall play by our rules!"

And the people cried out, "Alas, alas!! What have we done?" But yea verily, it was too late. The people set upon The One and spat upon him and stoned him, and his name was dung. And the once mighty nation was no more; and the once proud people were without sustenance or shelter or hope. And the Change "The One" had given them was as like unto a poison that had destroyed them and like a whirlwind that consumed all that they had built.

And the people beat their chests in despair and cried out in anguish, "give us back our nation and our pride and our hope!!" But it was too late, and their homeland was no more.

You may think this a fairy tale, but it's not. It's happening RIGHT NOW.

THIS really tells it like it is. After reading it -- and before you go into the bathroom to throw-up -- forward it to your friends and those you know who care about our country and what is happening to it under the rule of Commissar Obamanation.

P.S. -- Yeah, this is too true to be funny. Tragic, but not funny; tragic but true.

- Asked by Female, Who Cares?

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Sex & Intimacy / 1 day ago

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Okay - another question that needed POPPING - so to speak (write)

How come women don't start demanding happy endings to their professional massages?

I, for one, don't want anybody else handling the goods but me - yes, I do know how selfish that may sound - just being honest.

Thank you Women of Answerology

- POP'd by lom2009, A Guy Critical, Male, 36-45, Halifax

Have you ever gotten a massage with a happy ending?

I'm kind of hard up right now and this would be a great release without picking up some skank in a bar. I saw some providers on some websites, backpage or something like that and theeroticreview. They have many providers. Some were total escorts and escorts services while many were independent erotic massages. I am worried about getting entrapped by the cops or set up to get mugged or worse by the provider.

- Asked by Male, 29-35

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Sex & Intimacy / 1 day ago

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speaking of being horny

so for the last 2 weeks, during the day, i feel like someone's giving me oral. not that i'm complaining cause it feels good, but what the hell is up with that?

Update: November 19, 2009.
i am so serious though guys. i'm not touching myself or anything or doing anything sexual. lol, and no i'm not on any meds. this just randomly happens during the day.

- Asked by butterflyz, A Creative, Female, 29-35, Student

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Sex & Intimacy / 1 day ago

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how do i stop the kids from finding out my wife n their mum is psycoticly mentaly ill and,

my wife was mentaly ill when we met with bi-polar but the woman she was, was woth all the trouble so far, however now the illness is severe and we have two children 3yrs and 6yrs.(love them both to death), but i need to think of them now that my wife is no longer the same person she was, we have had no help/support from the hospitals/gp, so i hope some of you may speak from experience of careing for the mentaly ill, but that's all it is an illness like a cold only the symptom's are unpridictable. so should we as a family stick together for the sake of my wife, or should i leave for the sake of the kids???????

- Asked by A Career Man, Male, 36-45, Sheffield, Medical / Dental

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Sex & Intimacy / 1 day ago

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Ya see.................... ..

Sure you can have multiples but look at all the other times that you cant reach the O. Is it really worth it?

I would like to say I have a 100% completion rate, not counting times partner said to stop (some were good reasons).

- POP'd by drallig9399, A Hip Hop Guy, Male, 26-28, Administrative

I alway masturbate on my stomach, but I think this is why I cant orgasm on my back/oral sex. Help!

I think the maturbation on your stomach is more of a sexual simulation, and now, no matter how hard I try, I cannot orgasm from regular on my back masturbation or from oral sex from my boyfriend. I know its not my boyfriends skills because I have never orgasmed my entire life from oral. Did I ruin being able to orgasm those other ways by masturbating on my stomach??!?! Help!

- Asked by Female, 22-25

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Sex & Intimacy / 1 day ago