--Will I ever know how he feels?-- How would I know if a man really loved me, without him telling me what he is feeling? When I ask he says he cares and I should know by his actions. Well, okay, but his actions aren't telling me how he is feeling or what I am to him.
We do not live together, but have talked about our future and how great we'd be together. We are also best friends, which should always come first, and there is definite chemistry both physically & intellectually. When the subject comes up, not always from me, but others who may be with us, he dances around the question.
We are both over 40, both educated & employed. Both divorced (for several years) and kids are on their own. He says he talks about me to his friends and co-workers. Work has been stressful for both of us, but it never prevented him from being open before.
I guess I just want to know if he loves me enough to be his one and only, even if only someday and yes I could love him forever without getting married. That's all. OR, maybe he is only keeping me close in case he does not find anyone else. Yes, he knows I am madly in love with him. We've been a "couple" (??) for over 2 years, but I still don't feel like I am his or part of a couple [No, he is not seeing anyone else].
In the past he would reveal his feelings towards me, which he seemed very comfortable doing, but then it would end bluntly because of time constraints, interruption, etc... (I never pushed it, it just would happen). That does not happen now. How am I just supposed to "see by his actions?"
He used to call me "sweetheart, bunny,or baby..." I was someone he thought was so very different: interesting, smart, funny, sexy, "adorable" and young at heart, always having fun and positive in life: and that was what he really liked about me. He was attracted to me because that is how his outlook on life is. (he's told me these things before)
OK. Then how come I don't know what I mean to him?
I hate not knowing what WE are and how much I mean to him. I am not looking for a ring, marriage or any ultimatum. I just want his feelings towards me and what he feels for us. Is it that hard to tell someone you supposedly care for so much how you feel once in awhile? Or let her know in what way she is special? Perhaps maybe you appreciate certain things she does for you? Do you wake up thinking of me? I don't know the answers to these things. As far as knowing what he feels/thinks, I'm not talking every day. Not even every week. But it would still be nice to hear, even if just once in awhile.
(I know many men do not like to talk feelings or be romantic, but how do they love someone and not express it? How would a woman even know?) - Asked by Female, Who Cares? |